Kyle Joseph Rohen (dolor_verum_est) wrote in church_of_kyle,
Kyle Joseph Rohen

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GOD is in the tv

New items of interest here at the church:

We now have an icon to direct us. Behold the power of Christ!

The Church fully endorses the following products:
- Pepsi and all Pepsi products
- Dr. Pepper and all Dr. Pepper products
- Blue Bell Ice Cream
- Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream
- Checkers (the fast food restaurant)
- Chinese food
- Clairol
- Mary Kate and Ashley cosmetics and accessories

The Church has no problem with the following products but does not specifically endorse them:

- Coca-Cola and related products
- Taco Bell
- Burger King
- Avon cosmetics and accessories

The Church believes the following to be sinful (in a bad way) and that they should be boycotted:

- Generic Dr. Pepper
- The Sweet Factory
- Dasani Raspberry water
- The Energizer Bunny (Energizer batteries are ok)
- The Cheerios with the prepackaged strawberries
- Special K with the prepackaged strawberries
- Geico
- Tony Little

Also, once the rest of the Anti-Kyleist figures get livejournals war will be declared and battles will be fought. The way the battles will be fought will be through Mortal Kombat the game. God will face Satan, the second coming of Christ will face the Anti-Christ, and the Not So Virgin Mary will face the Queen of the Emo Children/Queen of Hell. And so on down the line.
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